31 August 2013

Lagniappe: FAIL.

Consistency is not my strong suit. My best friend Ghost once told me I was predictable in my unpredictability, so it's safe to say I won't be sticking to some sort of blogging "schedule"--my life is structured enough, thanks!

It's not that I'm not cooking though. I always am, usually about 5 days a week, tooling around with new recipes or finessing old ones with the eventual goal of posting them here. But, like any human I am prone to failure and not all of these recipes are successes! Whether it's due to human error on my part or a poorly written original recipe, the gaps in posting can be chalked up to something that didn't work out.

My godfather Harry suggested that I *do* write about my failures to have a more balanced viewpoint, but without any positive conclusion (this recipe was totally screwy, but LOOK, here's how I fixed it!) it's just a long FAIL blog post and no one wants that. For example, do you want to read an entire post about how the Lemon Blueberry Loaf I attempted on Monday was too moist, too dense, and wayyyyy too much work with glazing this and sifting that and zesting this and the other thing? At the end of the day it's just me being mad at a cake on my counter and what is THAT? No.

If I think a recipe is worth another shot (that cake is not, btw) I will continue to work with it and tweak it (like the Crispy Zucchini Cakes I attempted and screwed up--too much onion, too much moisture, cakes too big and tall) until I have a success, where I will write about it and mention how I royally effed it all up before so that you don't have to waste your time making my same mistakes. See: History; repeating itself, et. al.

tl; dr I don't blog about my failed cooking escapades because that's stupid and not the point of this blog.

I'm in Long Island with my Bonus Parents (godparents that are way more than godparents) this Labor Day weekend so I won't be doing much experimenting. In the meantime, drink one for me to toast the end of summer (BUT WHO IS REALLY WANTING TO TOAST THAT??? COME HERE SO I CAN SMACK YOU!) and I'll be back in the kitchen with flour on my nose and sugar sparkling on my skin next week.

The shitty, ill-fated Lemon Blueberry Loaf.

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